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Features
Actors: T.J. Glenn, Jennifer Lauren Grant, Courtney Henggeler, Jeffrey Howard, J. Christian Ingvordsen
Directors: J. Christian Ingvordsen
Format: Color, DVD-Video, NTSC
Language: English
Region: Region 1 (U.S. and Canada only. Read more about DVD formats.)
Aspect Ratio: 1.33:1
Number of discs: 1
Rating: 
Studio: Mti Home Video
DVD Release Date: March 4, 2003
Run Time: 85 minutes
Average Customer Review:
  (10 customer reviews)
Reader Reviews
Oh, my aching brain...with some of the things I subject it to, it's a wonder it hasn't called it quits by now. Most recently I'm referring to this movie titled The Bog Creatures (2003), which someone actually stated that it was the `scariest movie I've seen since Ridley Scott's "Alien"'...um, what the heck were you smoking, and where can I get some? Seriously, I think this is a movie that requires some sort of mind altering substances to allow one to sit through it in its entirety and claim it was actually good...directed by J. Christian Ingvordsen (Mob War, Cyber Vengeance), this Danish production stars a whole bunch of actors I've never heard of, who have appeared in a whole lot of movies (direct to video efforts) I've never seen... The film takes place in Denmark, and on the outset we learn the year is 802 AD, location Valborg Castle...to which we see a bunch of dudes running around, waving shiny weapons, accosting half nekkid babes (brief boobage included)...we later learn these dudes are supposed to be some sort of dark, berserker clan/cult, led by a witchy woman (oooh, oooh, witchy woman), and they are in the process of sacrificing themselves some virgins. Anyway, fast forward 1200 years later and we see a group of American college students types (3 guys, 2 girls) who have supposedly been selected from hundreds of possible candidates, indicating these chosen few were the `cream' of the crop, but nothing else indicates that other than that's what it says in the script (if these are the best choices, the rest must have been real doozies). Okay, so a professor sends them off to a peat bog in an effort to dig up some well-preserved corpses (we come to find out the deceased residents of the bog are mostly comprised of members of the berserker clan we saw earlier). Arriving near their destination, they're greeted by a heavy set drunken guide in leather pants with what sounds a lot like a Scottish accent (actually, he reminds me of Willie from The Simpsons, only not as funny)...who spews forth an obligatory warning "Yer all a ginna die!" So the groups sets up residence near the castle we saw in the opening of the film, and they begin their excavation, which entails them digging about an inch and a half into the ground before finding some specimens. But wait...who are those mysterious individuals lurking about? The ones wearing coats made of moss? And now the groups guide has disappeared? And who's that buxom, frightened babe found wandering the woods? Perhaps a member of an earlier party? I actually stopped caring about ten minutes in, and let myself be drawn along like a broken twig on the currents of a mighty river...a mighty stupid river... For me trepidation set in pretty early in The Bog Creatures as the berserkers hardly looked as menacing as I think they were intended to be...actually, they looked more like a bunch of dudes from a local tavern, dressed up in some cheap costumes, and instructed act all bloodthirsty and such...one issue I have when films try to depicted ancient time periods is often the individuals cast look too well-groomed, too `fresh' to be of the era. I'd hardly expect berserker/Viking types of a period some 1200 years ago to have finely coifed perms and mullets, much less shiny, white teeth...and that castle, the one that's been deserted for hundreds of years, looks pretty well preserved, even to the point where it appears recent maintenance had taken place (the brick and mortar in the large fireplace look suspiciously new)...well, turns out these were relatively minor aspects of much worse things to come...the two, most painful aspects of this film is the acting and the dialog, followed closely by the direction and the story...I could also throw the smarmy, smart alecky characters on the heap while I am at it, but they were virtually non-existent in the sense they had no `feel' to them, no substance. In terms of the acting, one of the things that stood out the most was the nearly complete lack of shock/horror/surprise from the students when the bog creatures became all animated and such, and begin attacking the small group...I dunno, I see the recently revived dead and I'm gonna have a brownout in my shorts. The dialog is really awful and seems to indicate whoever wrote it must be an alien unfamiliar with how us humans really speak to each other (hint, it's not usually in terms of odd, disconnected statements interspersed with painful bouts of exposition). As far as the directing Ingvordsen seems to know how to set up a shot, but not a lot else...there was absolutely no tension, horror, scares, or anything in that vein to be found in the film...I wasn't expecting a lot, but to be so completely devoid of these elements almost required a thoughtful omission...and the film drags on and on...the run time of the film is a thankfully short hour and nearly twenty minutes, but the pacing will give the impression of it being much longer (things don't actually get moving until about 45 minutes in). Given that this was the director's 18th film (or something along those lines), I would have thought he would have gotten better by now, that is unless his initial ventures were that much worse than this one, which is pretty hard to believe. The special effects aren't too bad, and someone else mentioned they thought most of the money was probably spent on creating the bog creatures, to which I'd agree. It's obvious they didn't have the funds to do a through job on all of the creatures, so only a handful tend to get the up close and personal screen time. As far as the portrayal of the bog creatures, sometimes they were highly animated, and sometimes they lumbered around like the recently revived dead, creaky, rotting joints and all...pick a path and stick to it...personally I would have chosen the whole lumbering motif, but certainly not a mixture. You may be asking me about now if there wasn't anything I liked about the film...I thought the females were attractive, and it would have helped if there were more scenes where they were nekkid...there was one scene when one is giving another a sort of sponge bath, but it's just a wasted opportunity as there's no boobage, only cleavage. The fullscreen picture on this DVD looks pretty decent (it does have that sort of video feel vs. that of film), and the audio comes through fairly well most of the time. In terms of special features, there is a `making of' featurette, along with a trailer for the film along with ones for three other films in Legend of the Phantom Rider (2002), Stricken (1998), and Sanitarium (2001). Cookieman108
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Bog Creatures
Available from Amazon
Price: $9.98
Updated on 12-7-2008.
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